Raising a child is extremely hard. What makes the situation worse is that there is no one correct way of doing it and it all differs from child to child.
One would think more researches and books would help, but they only make everything much more confusing. We all try to give our children the right environment where they will grow up with confidence and will become successful adults.
But again, it will all vary depending on their school and home environment, their friends and most of all you, the parent.
Here are 6 things that you should absolutely avoid as they lead to a negative impact on your child and his or her confidence.
1. Not allowing them to take risks.
You cannot sugar coat life for them forever. The sooner they learn to take risks the better. Being a parent it is natural for them to want to shelter them from injuries or heartbreak, but unless they learn to deal with such things in their developing years, they will not be able to cope with them when they grow up. Children are very strong and sometimes can handle much more rough things than us.
2. Being over protective and shielding them all the time.
Your children need to learn to take care of themselves, because sooner or later they will have to be on their own. Let them solve their own problems, they are more capable than you give them credit for. If you always do the hard work for them, they will lose their ability to tackle hardships and will grow up to be adults who are always dependent on others.
3. Being too quick to praise or criticize.
This will make your child too habitual to praise or too afraid of getting reprimanded if they don’t succeed. Try to find a middle ground, so that they will not think of success as the be all and end all of every venture.
4. Bribing your child every time you feel guilty.
It is not a good idea to cover up your guilt by getting them gifts. Same follows for rewarding them for good work. They need to learn that in real life, not every success will be treated with a gift. The sooner they learn, the better. Stop giving them bribes for good behaviour and punishments for bad.
5. Not accepting your shortcomings and always making comparisons.
Most of the parents have this annoying habit of comparing their kids with others. And it infuriates teenagers the most. Respect them as individuals and don’t compare them to anyone. Also, tell them about your own teenage years and the fails you had, so that they can learn from your mistakes at the same time as bonding with you better.
6. Not following your own words.
If you don’t practice what you preach, you are sending a very wrong signal to your child. Always try to follow up on your word and if you think you are not capable of doing so, be forward and own it up. It is important that they learn that their character is more important than what people think of them.